Saturday, February 28

why does everyone call the results day their big day? it's not a fucking big day. well at least its' not my big day. to me, big days are like performance days, somebody's birthday, MY birthday etc.

my left elbow hurts. its all sore and painful. maybe been lifting the chainsaw too many times.

watched 2 movies. big fish and gladiatress.

DO NOT WATCH GLADIATRESS.

it doesnt stick to the point and the actresses are muchos ugly. all three lead actresses are hideous. even the actors are hideous. its a perfect B-grade movie. cheap production. and it's not funny at all. do not let little kids watch it.

big fish was ok. i thought it would be a soppy tearjerker, but it wasnt. got cheated. damn.

waiting for the asterix and obelix movie to come out.

damn the devil! damn the devil to hell!

*throws chainsaw high up*

Friday, February 27

ha. nervous for nothing. did pretty well according to my standards. yishun junior college, here i come!

*raises chainsaw in victory pose*

Thursday, February 26

i am so nervous. i have never been this nervous since the sing singapore semi-finals. fuckfuckfuck. i'm going to screw up my exams. when the results come out tomorrow i'll find out that i did so badly i could not qualify for even poly and have to retake my o levels again. i'm going to get 30+ points like jiewei and end up being a macdonald girl for life and have 3 kids and a cheating husband and i'll end up murdering him and throwing my kids out of the window in the three-room flat i live in and then finally gassing myself to death but the police comes in and drags me to the loony bin and everybody will say, "that poor woman she got 30+ L1R5 and that's why she ended up like that." and my mom will say:

"well it serves you right for not studying enough."

and my brother will say:

"huh? you are my sister! you cant do this to my reputation!"

and my father will say:

"that's why i told you, you should've gone to the temple with me to pray."

oh god. fuckfuckfuck. shizershizershizer. please let me die before i get my results!

Wednesday, February 25

sheesh i have to stop sleeping at 4 AM and waking up at 1 PM. so tonight i shall make myself sleep at 10!

had an accident with the hair removal cream last night and as a result i hyperventilated and nearly fainted. but i'm alright now, nothing to worry about!

o level results this fucking friday. oh shit oh shit oh shit oh shit oh shit oh shit oh shit oh shit.

erlack!

*starts up chainsaw*

Sunday, February 22

FAE
You are blessed with FAERY wings. Beauty,
laughter, life, magic...that's what you are all
about. You are refreshingly innocent and happy
with your life of purity and play. Life's a
game and it's a good one. In your eyes there's
no way to lose! You can be very mischeivous and
have been known to cause trouble, but it's all
in the name of fun and not meant to really harm
anyone. You like to play tricks on people who
aren't quite as bright or clever as you - which
is almost everyone. Nature is the setting you
prefer to be in - Always. Barefoot and wild you
can't be tamed. You're probably a restless
spirit who loves to travel, and quite a
dreamer. Your creativity is astounding and your
art (of whatever media - from writing to
painting to drama) is like something from
another world - ethereal and often very
fantasy-oriented. You can either be a social
butterfly or a loner with their head in the
clouds - but rarely inbetween. You stubbornly
refuse to accept responsibility or to give in
to the wishes of others - unless you feel like
it. You have a strong passion for music and
can't imagine life without it. You'll grow up
someday, but you'll always be a child at heart.
You are adventurous and love to take risks, and
feel a deep connection with the weather,
plants, and animals. You prefer sunshine to
thunder or snow, the warmth of summer to
autumn's chill, and quiet forests to suburban
backyards. Magic through and through, you are
far more powerful than you seem, and are
capable of being extremely passionate. Though
you can be childish, naive, stubborn, and self-
absorbed, one thing is certain - life with you
will never be boring!


*~*~*Claim Your Wings - Pics and Long Answers*~*~*
brought to you by Quizilla




Which Royalty Are You? Find out! By Nishi.


You are a Revolutionary Woman!
You could care less about the monarchy!
You live for yourself!


You're beautiful and kick-ass! And like a female-warrior. You're resourceful, smart, tough, street-smart. You live life for yourself and not as others dictate and refuse to be branded into a category. You live apart from world and society.
went to grandmutti's (potti?) house a few hours ago and looked at old photos. potti and gongti are such posh people in the past!! and i thought they were just boring old people. potti used to be a glamour girl in the 50s, she wore those rock-n-roll fluffy dirndl skirts and had lucille ball-esque hair, and she drinks coffee in hotels. gongti used to wear all-white suits and god he is such a hottie!! then there were even pre-war pictures of potti, circa 1930s and she was wearing those starlet cheongsums (ok, she's only about 5 or 6 then) and great-grandmutti was wearing those glam glam cheongsums, high-slit and all too.

man, i'm never looking at my grandparents the same way again.

my godmum and mutti used to wear ultra short 70s miniskirts, and they have the best pairs of legs i've ever seen! what happened to those gams? they look like mutton-legs now!

Friday, February 20

the stupidest line in "tarzan of the apes":

TARZAN (to jane): jump into my car.

fuck. burroughs HAD to make tarzan a civilised gentleman. so civilised that he can actually drive a car!!

oh btw if you're confused, the story is set in 1912, the titanic edwardian era. that's why i like the disney version. it's more backwards in time, the victorian era, and tarzan doesnt get marred by civilisation and he remains in the jungle with jane.
dammit the later sequels have such stupid storylines. wtf in the very much later sequels, tarzan goes to hollywood. tarzan fights the japanese in the ww2, tarzan the heavyweight champion. fuck fuck fuck. the stupid sequel writers have defiled my beloved jungle man. i shall stop reading the rest of the tarzan books and stick to "tarzan of the apes".

in fact tarzan of the apes pretty much sucked. i hate the part where he became all civilised and cultivated.
eeeee the sequel spoils the beauty of tarzan. true, tarzan marries jane in the end, but they dont live in the jungle. they go live in civilisation instead.

phooey.

scrap this sequel. i'm going to jump straight to the fourth sequel.
a continuation of my tarzanspik:

tarzan learned how to read and write english, but he could not speak english. it was until he rescued a french lieutenant from negro savages when he learned how to speak. but that french guy taught him how to speak french, and turned things upside down. in the end he speaks english with a french accent. in the later part of the novel, when he realises that jane had left to go back to america--

a note: jane is NOT english, she is AMERICAN.

he wants to go to america too. so the french guy cultivates him and brings him to european outposts. he actually went all the way to paris, where the french guy d'arnot wanted to determine his genetics. it was proven that tarzan is actually the rightful lord greystoke (the current lord greystoke is cecil clayton, tarzan's cousin, and also jane's suitor). tarzan goes to america to find jane in wisconsin. the ending is a cliffhanger. jane is torn between choosing tarzan or clayton, tarzan is torn between living with jane in america or returning to africa where his heart belongs, and clayton is blissfully unaware.

there's a sequel to the novel, which i haven't read yet. i'm going to read it in 5 minutes.
i'm going crazy with tarzan fever! actually i'm always crazy with tarzan fever...

after watching the disney tarzan, i watched the johnny weissmuller version of tarzan. he was the first talking tarzan (the others before him were silent movie tarzans) so he got really famous. the funniest scene was when he was learning jane's name.

when he said jane, he punches her shoulder lightly. when he said tarzan, he pokes his own chest. so he went, "jane. jane! jane. tarzan. jane. tarzan. jane. tarzan. jane. tarzan. jane. tarzan. jane. tarzan. " and each time he says jane, he punches her harder and harder.

i saw another version of tarzan too, the bo derek miles o'keeffe one. it totally sucked, although miles o'keeffe was the best-looking and sexiest tarzan of all the tarzans. the two of them were swimming in a pond, or rather, jane was swimming and tarzan was lying in the water suntanning. jane was gushing on and on about how wonderful everything is, this is like a dream yadda yadda yadda but tarzan just ignored her and went on kicking the water and suntanning. then she said, "don't you have a smile?"

tarzan ignored her.

so she said, "do you know that you are more beautiful than any girl i know?"

tarzan turned to her with a pissed expression.

but the sweetest tarzan moment was in the book version, tarzan of the apes. it's the original tarzan book written by edgar rice burroughs. this is the first thing he wrote to jane:

"I am Tarzan of the Apes. I want you. I am yours. You are mine. We will live here together always in my house. I will bring you the best fruits, the tenderest deer, the finest meats that roam the jungle. I will hunt for you. I am the greatest of the jungle hunters. I will fight for you. I am the mightiest of the jungle fighters. When you see this you will know that it is for you and that Tarzan of the Apes loves you."

you'll be wondering how come tarzan can speak so well. contrary to the movies, jane did not teach tarzan english. tarzan learns it himself, through a book he found. he knows that he is not an ape, and he tries not to be like them, so he uses a knife to shave his beardy stuff.

Thursday, February 19

if you know me well, you'll know that i love disney cartoons. i just watched tarzan for the first time (i know i'm slow) and i cried buckets of tears! what makes a good cartoon: romance, good action, good graphics, good theme songs and most of all, i must be able to cry at least twice in the movie.

for tarzan i cried five times in all.

for mulan i cried four times.

for beauty and the beast i cried twice.

for finding nemo i cried once. (but the graphics make it up)

for lilo and stitch i cried three times.

for brother bear i didnt cry. but it was a good movie for the humour scenes were great.

i cant remember anymore. but i tell you, tarzan is freaking HOT!!

Tuesday, February 17

the biggest tribulation of today: getting my hair to curl
i notice something. in other people's blogs they describe their day. but why the fuck should you describe your day? the day's over, you experienced it already now move on! if i want to describe my day, i'll at least put in some reflection or thoughts. not just the bloody description. blogs and diaries are meant for reflections and thoughts.

this means one thing. other people are crazy. i am sane.

i think i'm the only sane person in my dysfunctional school. my classmates are a strange bunch.

i didnt go to school today. i dont think i'll be going to school anymore. i really dont like school. i wouldnt mind if the school was yjc, but its fucking MI. i spent the day watching Sound of Music over and over again so i can write a fanfic about liesl. i love liesl she is so pretty.

Monday, February 16

1. You are attracted to those who have split personality, like cold as ice on the outside, but hot as fire in the heart.

2. In the process of courtship, the approach that would make you feel irresistable is moods-swing, blow hot and cold in love, vacillate.

3. The impression you would like to give to your lover is stylish.

4. You don't like it when your partner is insecure.

5. The kind of relationship you would like to build with your partner is one that you care not only about the present but also the future with your partner, a long-lasting relationship that you can grow with.

6. You can never be stabilized; actually, you are not suitable for marriage and you don't want to make committment.

7. You think of marriage as a precious thing. Once you get married, you'll treasure it and your partner very much.

8. At this moment, you are quite self-centered; you think of love as something you can get and trash anytime you want.
i went home alone from school today
and did some reflection along the way
i realise i have to stop acting like a yob
cos i'm not doing a very good job
i assaulted clarence with a water bottle
and he looked like he was about to throttle
my sorry little self and wring my neck
and kick my ass and break my back
i heard a helluva interesting stories
and laughed at my own follies
and i thought, "what the fuck!
people are more messed up!"
they made me want to scream and shout,
"look at me! i'm not a fucking lout!"
they made me want to break down in tears
because i can't face my own fears
but also they made me smile
and made my life worthwhile
because i've finally stopped ignoring
stopped wondering
stopped assuming
and picked my head up from the floor.

Sunday, February 15

apparently i got it wrong. eva uses harry for sex but she doesnt love him, but harry loves her. poor harry. naughty eva.
i just watched a movie on channel 5. it's pretty sick and confusing. it's about this english girl, eva, who is in love with her cousin joseph, who is a geologist. however she has to go work in the countryside so she takes up lodging with a pig farmer harry. harry is madly obssessively in love with eva. then joseph had his left leg blasted away in some canyon where he was collecting rocks so he returned to england. he meets up with eva and he falls for her too (btw eva is pretty ugly to me). but eva is touched by harry's love so she doesnt leave with joseph and joseph goes home alone. but harry stupidly had a one night stand with some wench and eva finds out and she is disgusted and she goes and live with joseph. they were a happy pair. however harry is so distraught that he wants to kill himself, and eva goes back to stop him from killing himself. but harry knows that eva still loves joseph so he hacked off his left leg with a chainsaw to be like joseph. eva feels indebted and decides to stay and look after harry, who is now a crazy loon. but joseph comes and convinced eva to marry him. so eva left the loon and married joseph.

what the fuck.

Saturday, February 14

for your info: anita mui is not chinese crap. she is a legend.
forgot to mention: got traumatized and assaulted by dhaniah's cat.
valentine's day today. went on a date with dhaniah, but she brought her friend along so it became a threesome. went to east coast park and cycled around the beach. now have icky tan lines.

just emerged from shower. my fingers are all wrinkly and pruney, something strange since it has never happened since i was 11. used a new shampoo. hair is straighter than ever. no, my hair on the left side is straight. hair on right side in loose curls. 8% of my hair ended up on the bathroom floor. trying to restore curls.

gorti came back from camp again. still coughing away. poor guy. he got the tekong flu.

i'm so damn tanned. must remember to wear sunblock next time.
went to temasek poly today for the open house. rather impressed. then sat in front of the LOTR roadshow for 4 hours waiting for dhaniah to come.

tried on many dresses from this fashion and i love all of them!! how unexpected. we picked the most outrageous ones and those turned out to be the most flattering ones. i am seriously thinking of getting the black goth one.

Thursday, February 12

i've finished reading the tamuli! yay! but kinda slow to my standards. took 4 days to complete 1200+ pages.

i even dreamt of the tamuli last night. i dreamt that i was some character they called fellatia! and apparently sir berit has the hots for me. and yeah, sir kalten looked like owen wilson in the dream.

then i woke up to go to the loos. then i went back to sleep. i dreamt i was looking for an old storybook and i found it! it still looks the same. i dont know where to book is now though. maybe i threw it away or gave it to my cousins. i miss my childhood.

then i woke up and decided not to go to school. so i went back to sleep. this time my dream has some serious sexual reference, so i wouldnt expand on that.

Saturday, February 7

i'm not an outcast. i just choose not to talk to you. and i choose not to listen either.

damn pooks.
my fashion sense

for going out shopping/library/anywhere WITHOUT dhaniah:
school t-shirt
or just about any clean t-shirt
baggy knee-length pants
waistpouch
flipflops

for going out shopping/library/anywhere WITH dhaniah (casual):
more presentable shirt
baggy knee-length pants
or jeans
bag or satchel
sneakers

for going out WITH dhaniah (dressing up for fun):
just about anything outrageous e.g. glitter/sequin tops, hippie style, fishnet tights
full face of make-up
sioux-indian boots

for going out WITH mom:
expensive blouse
tight flared jeans
or skirts
heels
or sneakers
FLIPFLOPS AND CHEAP TACKY BARGAIN CLOTHES ARE BANNED

clothes that i never touched since they were bought:
halter back-bearing skintight tops (i've got 4: white corset style, pink sequinny, red checked and green flowery)
ultra ultra short silky skirts (too many in a heap)
tube tops (2: white and pink)
black pvc para-para platform boots
tapered GUESS? jeans (used to be mom's)

accesories i ALWAYS wear:
dangly silver stars earrings
platinum chain w/ tiny diamond
friendship moodring
jade ring

the stuff i wear almost everyday:
fucking school uniform
i was reading my new classmates' blogs and realised what a tame, holistic world i live in. yeah! good for me! i'm achieving nirvana, once i stop swearing and cussing like a sailor, watching porn etc. hey i'm an inner sinner. i don't drink or smoke weed or go clubbing or have wild promiscuous unprotected sex. but i do what all the pervy geek losers do, plus a little more.

original hentai fiction, anyone?

the reason why i always wear headphones in school even though i'm not listening to music: so that people won't talk to me and show me how full of shit they are.

dhani said i love shindigs like campfire nite. ooh yeah! i love doing piercing xena calls and knowing no one can do anything to me cos they are all younger than me. and the darkness and the fire and the music sparks something dark and primitive and animalistic in me. thats why i love shindigs like these.

you can call me the mosh-pit freak.

techno and club music is shit. give me some good rock music to groove to (actually you cant groove to rock, but i'm too lazy to find the right word). and why do people like rap and hiphop? how do you dance to that shit??

why do people hate emopunk? i like emopunk.

Just like the white winged dove...
Sings a song...
Sounds like she's singing...
Whoo... whoo... whoo...
Just like the white winged dove...
Sings a song...
Sounds like she's singing...
Ooo baby... ooo... said ooo


ok stevie nicks isnt emopunk but i just happened to be listening to this song.

Friday, February 6

some words on the superficialities in my life:

cramps.

no eyebrows.

wavy hair.

no more clean shirts.

no food in the house.

hungry.

school.

Thursday, February 5

now i lost my eyebrows. i look like someone used a lawnmower on my face! my forehead is practically bald and i have a permanent surprised expression on my face now! how am i spozed to go to school tmr???

woke up late this morning, like around 6:30 AM. felt bad for missing school, so i studied lit until about 9 plus, then i watched TV. then went out to meet dhani. on the way met zhao and waltz. dhani was wearing such a cool outfit! i bought a black shirt so we'd look more similar, but i think i look more like an 80s glam rock fashion disaster. the shirt had a golden sequined dragon on it! but it was cheap so i bought it.

then decided to tidy up my brows, so i went to the cheap one in far east instead of the usual one i go to in paragon. PHWOAR! instead of trimming my brows, the beautician removed them!

then while my face was stinging with pain, i bumped into bernard and jason. this is such bad luck. they didn't even recognise me at first. i shouldn't have said hi, otherwise they wouldn't have seen me. darn! then i decided i couldnt show my face to the world anymore, so went home.

ai~ have to do lit and GP hw.

Wednesday, February 4

my hair still refuses to curl. now it hangs there, a mass of waves. but i want CURLS not WAVES. right after school i washed my hair and set it on sponge rollers. then about 15 minutes ago i removed the rollers and my hair is still damp!! and where are my curls?? i've been pottering around the house for 7 hours looking ridiculously stupid and this is what i get?? damp wavy hair??

i'm going to sue the stylist.

my hands smell like garlic. i have garlic breath. but i like garlic.

today another guy walked into my radar. i'm putting him under the "pretty face - non-prospect" category as for now. because he seriously has a pretty face. in fact he is so beautiful you can laugh about it. but i've only spoken a few lines to him, so i don't know about him enough to put him under the "pretty face - prospective" category.

i still hate school though. i hate all the attitude problems oozing out of everybody's pores. some believe they're damned high-powered. some believe that what they say is law. some believe other people's laws. some believe the whole fucking world kowtows to them 3 times a day each morning. some believe everybody else loves them. some believe they love everybody else.

i don't know why people glare at me whenever i call melvin "sumo". it's a compliment!! at least i dont call him "that fat ass" like some people do.

windy isn't it? no it's thursday. so am i, let's have a cup of tea.
i think i irritated many people in my class today because i kept singing broadway songs during lit. but it wasn't my fault! jonathan was trying to see how many musicals and songs i knew, and for this matter i am a scholar of all things ALW. ok not all but at least i know more of it than the average person.

talking to calven. or rather, he talking and me saying "haha ok" after everything he says. he pisses me off! he is SUCH a big sissy!

lionbat84@hotmail.com says:
Friendship forever.
lionbat84@hotmail.com says:
I love sharing friendship with my friends.
Marire Ua Whakahirahira Whatitiri says:
haha ok

lionbat84@hotmail.com says:
I love the feeling of friendship.

have you seen a guy talk like that?!

Monday, February 2

i shall take this opportunity to say something of no particular importance to world peace.

MY HAIR REFUSES TO CURL!!

it just hangs there from my head, a mop of limp straight hair, despite desperate revving ups from ultra-moisturizing shampoo, nutri-ceramide conditioner, curl enhancing lotion and heated rollers. but no, it just flops from my scalp like a wilted plant.

anyway enough of my hair.

i realized that i'm out of tune today when i attempted to sing in the bathroom. when i got my tune back on track, i realized that i'm not warmed up enough to carry it. then i realized that my vocal chords and diaphragm had gone slack and unwilling to work. so from tomorrow i'm going to dedicated one hour of vocal training to get myself back in shape before lessons start.

i hate school and i don't want to go to school tomorrow. i wish i could forever stop schooling. i wish i could just marry some rich guy and not study or work for my whole life ever. i wish i could burn down the school and murder my classmates and be sentenced to life imprisonment on a desert island in the southern pacific.

campfire nite this friday? count me in! i'm going to laugh at little people!

no potentials yet. my previous infatuation had revealed what a sucker i am to pretty faces. shall look beyond superficialities and materialism next time when looking for a love monkey. methinks i should forget about guys altogether and concentrate on being a better person.

dammit my hair still refuses to curl! must be the fucking dye-job.