I can safely presume that I'm the most sane, down-to-earth and ordinary girl in the world. I used to think that it would be cool to be different, but now I realise that it's far more satisfying to be normal. Being normal gives you a hold over the people who want to be different. You can look down on them and sniff and say, "What poor downtrodden creatures!"

So anyway I've not given up on my ambition to be a musical actress and go on Broadway. You know there is a fantastically wide difference being a singer and a musical West End/Broadway actress don't you? I want to be the next Lea Salonga, but unlike me she has supportive parents.

However that's just a crazy ambition since nobody likes seeing me onstage. Remember my Phantom of the Opera fiasco? Everybody could see my five-inch platform boots under my gown and realise I'm not as tall as I ought to be. Ha, ha. My first performance as young Cossette when I was 9 was a flop too, because then I didn't know how to sweep the floor. So I just paraded up and down dragging a broom as tall as I am behind me.

But that's all over now.

I don't understand people at all. They do the most outrageous things, things that can kill them, things that they don't like and yet they refuse to stop doing them. The saddest part is that they think it's such a big deal to them. Like it's their life or something.

And while people go out to get themselves killed, I'll sit quietly before the monitor ogling over personal ads. It's much more of life than what they call 'life'. Some people get embroiled in the underground scene. Some do drugs. Some get pregnant, get diseased. Some, especially some, turn to being call girls, bar maids etc. Some even get landed in jail or rehab. I know these people. I could've been one of those people. You'd never know.

But I'm sane. I know what life means. I know of past suffering and future joy. You can say I've got sense in my somewhat empty head. I don't do crazy things just to prove myself. I don't date older men and sell my body just to get extra pocket money, like M. I don't hang out in bars just to be grown-up, like E. I don't get entangled with gangs like B, W and D. I don't do drugs and drinks like so many people I know. I'm glad that N is finally turning over a new leaf after getting out of jail. He's got sense too.

Why don't I do these things? Because I've seen my fresh innocent girlfriends turn old and hard and trashy. I've seen guyfriends trying too hard to prove themselves, sometimes paying the ultimate sacrifice. I'm the typical mollycoddled, pampered and protected little missy, but the hell am I innocent. I've seen a lot, and I am to keep seeing things for the rest of my life.

But I'm content with my lot. That makes a difference. Expect less, and you'll receive a lot more.

P.S. Don't bother asking me about this. This is all you're gonna know about my negative side.

The day started off unimpressive enough. Woke at nine, had Lo Mai Kai and a cup of chicken Bovril for breakfast. And a Kit-Kat bar. Then used the com to type one chapter of one of my fantasy story. While typing I had writer's block and went out to clean bicycle. FYI: it stinks. When bicycle is clean, I went back to com and turned it off. Dad cooked his Save the World vegetarian soup noodles. It's real simple. Get a huge pot, dump three packets of instant noodles into it along with all the leftovers of the past week, including the old frozen rice. Bring it to boil. It is now ready to eat.

I spent the later half of my day clearing my room and ironing my clothes and reorganizing my aromatherapy drawer. Then I studied the Genotype section of Biology, before reading a bit of fiction. Aunt Iris and Uncle Jason came over. Aunt Iris gave a bunch of good but useless advice on ironing clothes. They left after about 20 minutes. I went back to my life. Mom returned from her trip in Thailand and got a bunch of goodies. She gave me 30 candles to add to my aromatherapy drawer. Also two new handbags and a black silk sarong which will prolly become my prom outfit.

We had decent food for dinner. Kentucky Fried Chicken. Mom was telling us about the movie Finding Nemo (she said Finding Meno) she watched on the plane. I had to correct her retelling, it's got lots of boo-boos.

Speaking of movies, I want to watch Daddy Day Care. I think people who watch teenybopper movies like Lizzie McGuire and Twins Effect are losers, because there ain't no morals in teenybopper movies. Besides, Twins Effect sounds like the typical Hong Kong translation of Buffy. When Hong Kong movies start to Westernize, you know it ain't good. What happened to the good old movies of Tony Leung Ka Fai and Leslie Cheung?

Anyway the best part of the day was Mom gave me a digital camera. It's old and low-tech but it's good.